Ce'dric left a notebook diary documenting his final days on earth. I have already shared many days of his final thoughts on my blogspot site for those that choose to read them. There are 22 days worth of his final thoughts left to blog about. Included in his daily writings are several drawings, sketches, thoughts, and poetry and songs.
I found this particular piece of work from Jan Brooks an interesting find. I had not never heard of her and her poetry and decided to research a bit about her. Ms Brooks is an inspirational poetry author and I found her work to be enjoyable to read. I did compare the below poem that Ce'dric had written in his notebook to the writings of Ms Brooks and found that he had changed a few words to personal this poem to the pain he was feeling.
The most interesting thing that crosses my mind is imaging how Ce'dric himself came across this poetry piece. Ce'dric was not into much outside of Alana and hockey. I never knew him to read a whole book, even for college. To read some of the things in his notebook diary, such as poems and song lyrics, caught me off guard. I guess it is true to his life after Alana died. Everyone says "there was nothing you could have done" and I guess that is true. I wonder really, did Ce'dric leave this poem to let us know how he felt about how there was nothing going to stop Alana, or did he leave it for us, to let us know there was nothing going to stop him.
I Never Knew
Jan Brooks/Ce'dric
Such a waste, But what could I do?
A life was lost, And I never knew.
Such a waste, But what could I do?
A life was lost, And I never knew.
No one knew, That she was in pain,
She didn’t say, Or ever explain.
Can’t explain, How it made me feel,
But her death, Was ever so real.
Can’t explain, How it made me feel,
But her death, Was ever so real.
All so real, The loss of someone,
So tragic, The pain is not done.
It’s not done, It never quite ends,We never,
Get over lost friends. These friends,
Sometimes lose their way, They retreat,
And why, they won’t say.
They won’t say, That their pain was deep,
We don’t know, The secrets they keep.
It’s not done, It never quite ends,We never,
Get over lost friends. These friends,
Sometimes lose their way, They retreat,
And why, they won’t say.
They won’t say, That their pain was deep,
We don’t know, The secrets they keep.
She can’t keep, Us from our grieving,
No one knew, She planned on leaving.
Her leaving, A shock to us all,
Just so sad, That she took the fall.
No one knew, She planned on leaving.
Her leaving, A shock to us all,
Just so sad, That she took the fall.
Took the fall, When things were so bad,
She forgot, About friends she had.
Friends she had, Who could have been there,
If they’d known, Because they did care.
We did care, But she never knew,She forgot, About friends she had.
Friends she had, Who could have been there,
If they’d known, Because they did care.
Now she’s gone, And part of me died too…
