Gracie was the bravest little girl I knew, perhaps the bravest person I will ever meet in my journey on earth. She was the strong one, always, when we would visit. I spent many hours with her in the final months in her journey on earth and I can count on one hand how many times she cried because she was dying. On the other hand I can count how many times she complained about receiving chemo and radiation due to her brain cancer and how it over took her tiny little body. I'm not saying she never cried, but the tears that fell because she was leaving earth were few and far between. She accepted her fate of such a short time on earth and believed with all her heart she was going to live with God.
Gracie knew more about heaven and what it held for her then anyone else I have ever talked to about heaven. She talked about what it looked like, she talked about her journey between earth and heaven and the park she would get to live in until God was ready to meet her. She held as much knowledge about God and his plan for her in her head than the love she held in her heart for Him.. She liked the idea of working for God in heaven and meeting his mommy and her son Jesus. "It's going to be beautiful there Jett," she would tell me, "more beautiful than anything we see on earth."
When I first met Gracie she was very tough on me and it was intimidating to me until I realized how she was just trying to protect me from a friendship that in a matter of weeks would have to continue in our hearts. "Do not treat me special because I have cancer." Do not feel sorry for me because I am going to heaven. Do not cry when I leave." It was constant, those demands. I could pinky promise her all day long on those demands but I would break the promise every day I left her as I cried on my ride home. She would text me from her mom's cell phone about five minutes after I left. Stop crying Jett I know you are. She would be 100% absolutely right about that with each and every text she sent.
I pinky promised Gracie that after she left us on earth I would go to visit her final resting place on earth often. "Keep the dust off of me please", she would say with a laugh. It is one of the many pinky promises I have kept. Yes, I keep the dust off of her, and yes I leave her gifts. Anything pink from hair ribbons (because she assured me over and over again she will get her long pretty hair back in heaven) to barbie dolls in pink clothes. I also leave post it notes, on pink paper of course, telling her things going on back here on earth. VISITED YOUR MOMMY AND DADDY TODAY ; OLIVIA WORE YOUR KICKS TODAY ; ATE A CHERRY CREME DONUT TODAY. Insane, I know, but it helps my heart. I miss my buddy, my little angel on earth.
I also sit with her and talk about all the people I brought into her life, filling her in on what everyone is doing. I like to imagine she is still sitting with me, making faces at me and telling me "you're silly, silly as your name is". I can close my eyes and hear her giggle, see her bright smile, hear her heart beat - bursting with all the love she allowed to live in it. Truly she is a child of God, from the moment she took her first breath, to the moment she took the final breath that carried her beyond a breath of life on earth.
Gracie was brave, strong, positive, and courageous, and when she was ready to die she was brave, strong, positive and courageous for the rest of us. She dedicated her remaining weeks of life to make sure those left behind were going to be alright. When Gracie told her parents she did not want any more treatments it let everyone involved in her treatment know that this tough little girl was ready to go. I watched Gracie at the Cancer Center the last day she would ever step out of that building and go home and prepare herself for God and the life in heaven he was offering her.
I watched all those medical professionals as they tried to be tough for her. I watched as they held back tears, as they said goodbye to her, as they quietly walked away. I heard her tell each one of them to be positive for the rest of the kids, to be strong for them and told them "do not cry when I leave today." I tried to put myself in her parents shoes that day when they drove away from the only place that could prolong the life of the child they were losing, knowing it was near the end for them, this family of three. The only day sadder to me than the day she stopped her treatments was the day I went to visit her at the hospital for the very last time.
Gracie left this earth a better place. She left this earth with more love then it had when she was alive. She left a big mark for the short eight years she was with us. She left so gracefully for an eight year old little girl that lived her life as if would never end. She believed, she had hope, she had faith, she had love, she had God on her side. The strength she showed up until the day she died was as contagious as the love she shared with all.
If you know someone who has dedicated their life to making a sick child's life better, please find a way to thank them for doing a job that takes someone with the strength of a dying child to do. They also have to be brave and strong and positive and courageous. The doctors, the nurses, the staff in our medical facilities, the volunteers, the parents, the siblings, the families and the friends that hang tough and believe, and hope, and pray for a cure.
Stay Strong
(follow this link and try not to shed a tear)
(If you enjoyed this blog, please follow the ad links on this page to support future publishing.)
Gracie knew more about heaven and what it held for her then anyone else I have ever talked to about heaven. She talked about what it looked like, she talked about her journey between earth and heaven and the park she would get to live in until God was ready to meet her. She held as much knowledge about God and his plan for her in her head than the love she held in her heart for Him.. She liked the idea of working for God in heaven and meeting his mommy and her son Jesus. "It's going to be beautiful there Jett," she would tell me, "more beautiful than anything we see on earth."
When I first met Gracie she was very tough on me and it was intimidating to me until I realized how she was just trying to protect me from a friendship that in a matter of weeks would have to continue in our hearts. "Do not treat me special because I have cancer." Do not feel sorry for me because I am going to heaven. Do not cry when I leave." It was constant, those demands. I could pinky promise her all day long on those demands but I would break the promise every day I left her as I cried on my ride home. She would text me from her mom's cell phone about five minutes after I left. Stop crying Jett I know you are. She would be 100% absolutely right about that with each and every text she sent.
I pinky promised Gracie that after she left us on earth I would go to visit her final resting place on earth often. "Keep the dust off of me please", she would say with a laugh. It is one of the many pinky promises I have kept. Yes, I keep the dust off of her, and yes I leave her gifts. Anything pink from hair ribbons (because she assured me over and over again she will get her long pretty hair back in heaven) to barbie dolls in pink clothes. I also leave post it notes, on pink paper of course, telling her things going on back here on earth. VISITED YOUR MOMMY AND DADDY TODAY ; OLIVIA WORE YOUR KICKS TODAY ; ATE A CHERRY CREME DONUT TODAY. Insane, I know, but it helps my heart. I miss my buddy, my little angel on earth.
I also sit with her and talk about all the people I brought into her life, filling her in on what everyone is doing. I like to imagine she is still sitting with me, making faces at me and telling me "you're silly, silly as your name is". I can close my eyes and hear her giggle, see her bright smile, hear her heart beat - bursting with all the love she allowed to live in it. Truly she is a child of God, from the moment she took her first breath, to the moment she took the final breath that carried her beyond a breath of life on earth.
Gracie was brave, strong, positive, and courageous, and when she was ready to die she was brave, strong, positive and courageous for the rest of us. She dedicated her remaining weeks of life to make sure those left behind were going to be alright. When Gracie told her parents she did not want any more treatments it let everyone involved in her treatment know that this tough little girl was ready to go. I watched Gracie at the Cancer Center the last day she would ever step out of that building and go home and prepare herself for God and the life in heaven he was offering her.
I watched all those medical professionals as they tried to be tough for her. I watched as they held back tears, as they said goodbye to her, as they quietly walked away. I heard her tell each one of them to be positive for the rest of the kids, to be strong for them and told them "do not cry when I leave today." I tried to put myself in her parents shoes that day when they drove away from the only place that could prolong the life of the child they were losing, knowing it was near the end for them, this family of three. The only day sadder to me than the day she stopped her treatments was the day I went to visit her at the hospital for the very last time.
Gracie left this earth a better place. She left this earth with more love then it had when she was alive. She left a big mark for the short eight years she was with us. She left so gracefully for an eight year old little girl that lived her life as if would never end. She believed, she had hope, she had faith, she had love, she had God on her side. The strength she showed up until the day she died was as contagious as the love she shared with all.
If you know someone who has dedicated their life to making a sick child's life better, please find a way to thank them for doing a job that takes someone with the strength of a dying child to do. They also have to be brave and strong and positive and courageous. The doctors, the nurses, the staff in our medical facilities, the volunteers, the parents, the siblings, the families and the friends that hang tough and believe, and hope, and pray for a cure.
Stay Strong
(follow this link and try not to shed a tear)
I love and miss you Gracie, with every beat of my heart.
"Someday will never be soon enough" :-)
~ Jett
(If you enjoyed this blog, please follow the ad links on this page to support future publishing.)
